June 2012
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that was
DEFINITELY the asscreed 3 logo on that wii u controller
interesting.
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lmao wow this got fucking gnarly
this has got to be the dead i land guys
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splinter cell dubstep
take a shot
(we’re up to 5 dubstep instances now)
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WHY DID THE STRIPPER TURN INTO THAT GUY
WHAT TH EFUCK IS GOING ON
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WE WERE FUCKING A LADY WITH HER TITTIES OUT IN FRONT OF LIKE A MILLION NATIVE WARRIORS WHO THIS WHITE GUY IS NOW GOING TO LEAD TO VICTORY I GUESS
WHAT IS
NO
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WHY ARE WE FUCKING A LADY
I JUST
WANTED TO SHOOT SOME JUNGLE ANIMALS
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omfg this is so surreal i cant even summarize this
e3 hadn’t been weird enough yet, i’m glad we can always rely on ubisoft to do something fucking absurd
im too weirded out to even type my tags right, i tried to od giant crab enemy
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why are there dancers
why is there wild wild west
UBISOFT WHAT DID YOU DO
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ok we’re almost ready for ubisoft
i need someone to hold my hand through everything related to ac3
maybe they’ll show us liberation or whatever……..
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so far nothing super exciting, but i’ve got high hopes for ubisoft/sony/nintendo and i’m holding out for some demos/premieres today and tomorrow
im probably gonna weep through ac3 though
i might need a hug
if you haven’t unfollowed me yet, you are lovely and wonderful
(holy shit revengeance ajsfhsdfjkshdkjhsdg HE JUST PULLED SOMEBODY’S CYBORG SPINE OUT)
yo when is the valve presentation i might have to...
no idea, i’ll let you know if i find out anything
not today, though
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oh yeah i guess crysis has gun-shoot
that’s cool too
but damn that landscape.
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no go back outside i wanna jizz over the Earth After Humanity landscape again WHEW OK WE’RE GOOD
FUCK CRYSIS IS AN OPEN WORLD GAME YOU CAN PROBABLY EXPLORE ALL THAT
IF I CAN STILL THROW FROGS TO THE MOON I’M SOLD
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OMFG OVERGROWN ABANDONED CITY
BONERS COMING OUT OF BONERS
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beesmygod:
microsoft 2012: sportz
ea: sportz
wiiu: miisportz
sony:
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WHERE’S THE CRYSIS 3 OBAMA
I’M NOT EVEN THAT HYPED FOR IT IT’S JUST LIKE THE ONLY THING IN THIS PRESSER I CARE ABOUT
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they’ve got 15 minutes
where’s crysis 3
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omg
richard says that was linkin park in the medal of honor trailer
omg
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i have no interest in warfare shootgame but frostbite 2 sure is pretty
if those fog and smoke effects were a person i’d make out with em
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they keep using the term ‘living service’
i dont understand what this means
i think they’re trying to come up with a fancy name for ‘dlc’
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BATTLEFIELD 3 DUBSTEP
TAKE A SHOT
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beesmygod:
YOU CANT CUT BACK THE SIMCITY 5 PRESENTATION. YOULL REGRET THIS!!!
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DID LIKE 30 PEOPLE RUN OUT OF THAT LITTLE SIM...
OMFG THEY WERE BURNING TO DEATH
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OH GOD YES MY BONER FINALLY
whoa EITS apparently it’s postrock day at e3
curved roads and multiplayer ok good
little underwhelmed but whatever i just want a new simcity
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ok i don’t care about the facebook simcity just
show me the new simcity game
put the crack in my eyes
shoot me up and send me off
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SIMULATED TWITTER FEED
EVEN THEY CANT KEEP A STRAIGHT FACE
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Year 400000000000 of the Madden team explaining...
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did i just watch isaac get unbirthed into an alien anus
is this an alien colonoscopy
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this isnt scary
its not scary
it’s…. it’s not scary :(
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WHY IS DEAD SPACE NOT ON A SPACESHIP
IN SPACE
ITS CALLED
DEAD SPACE
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MOVE YOUR MIC OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH
OR JUST STOP BREATHING
YOU GOT SOLLUX-VOICE
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i'm gonna miss all the really awful stuff aren't i...
it actually sounds like it’s gonna be p boring unless they’ve got some surprises up their sleeves
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welp that sure was an adventure
and by adventure i mean one big collective shrug
RENDEZVOUS IN AN HOUR AND A HALF
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oh fuck we might hear about metro last light
COME ONNNNN YES
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HELLO JELLO DISASTER SCREEN MY DEAREST FRIEND
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WHY IS THERE BATMAN VOICE IN CODBLOPS 2
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HE PAUSED TO LET THE USHER PUN SINK IN
I HATE MY LIFE
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hello prerendered kinect game footage how you doin
harmonix why
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WHY IS THERE USHER
how much are they paying him
jesus he must be doing really poorly
here’s the fun thing about e3: it can’t decide whether it wants to be a Gaming Event or a Press Event or an Advertising Event
and as a result you get
shit like this
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HARMONIX
and then
dance central
i think i broke land speed records going from ‘fuck yes’ to ‘disappointed as hell’
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FRAMERATE DROP
dsfdgg
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wait no why is
why is there a south park rpg
can we go back to the shitty kinect game
NO I DONT WANT SOUTH PARK
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OH MAN WE’RE GONNA GET OUR KINECT DEMO AFTER ALL
AND THEY GOT A GIRL TO DEMO THE ‘CUTE’ GAME
oh jesus shame jitters somebody kill me
its basically angry birds with kinect
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RUN AWAY FROM THE EXPLOSION
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this poor guy playing re6 cannot aim for fuck
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lmao what the fuck is this it looks horrible
‘ASCEND: NEW GODS’ wtf
i guess
it’s god of war from microsoft
holy shit that was low poly as fuck
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from what i can tell the entire game is just horrible things happening to lara croft in grueling detail and her screaming and gasping and moaning about it
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is this the same tomb raider game they showed last...
au-nat-urelle:
brotherentropy:
are they making yearly tomb raiders again
it’s the same one, yeah. they’ve toned down the mid-coital reaction noises but it’s just
boring
false alarm the sexy snuff porn noises are back